small blessings

So, I thought I could get away with not writing until Friday but I've just remembered family are coming round and it's goooood to be social, especially around the times of weddings etc. you never know what bizarre family stories will be revealed. My cousin gets married this weekend and I'm feeling excited & nervous all at the same time, her mum has been gone two years now and I don't know what to expect, I've defiantly lost the child of the family status now everyone is having children, this is a good thing I can be myself and funny to shadow sad moments hopefully. I know she will be there with us, my auntie, I just really hope those who need her most, her daughters and husband can feel her. i really appreciate the cycle of life and how children can bring hope to people who have lost someone, I just hope others passed the time of bringing new life to the world can find comfort in these blessings.


I'm really happy in my new job, there have been occasions where I've thought what the heck am I doing here, why am I in charge of this, but other thoughts have been on my side, I may have had a slow, messy start to the year but the energy in general around feels fairly healthy.
it's so important to hold onto every second, and even though I'm knackered with slight shadows below my eyes there's still chance of a smile..

hope your well who you are.

roots
touching others souls
our human connection
even without literal touch
a spectrum of light
seen only by the blind

under obituary

why do I let you know
you come along
have a look
and then
go

Chocolate & Coffee & 'I'd rather go blind.'

smell, clinging to sheets.
touch, slowly settles in on skin,
like falling dust,
incapable of resisting the measure
of weathering
your unintentionally causing to place
on a permeable membrane.

praha

... it sounds so full of pride, and it is.
The walls haven't been dented by the war,
the castle is still standing so tall.
Staircases sweep round, trams run,
glide through the city grounds.
Just calm here, voices are softened -
I feel close to death when I'm here,
close to the dead in this church building,
the rows lined up, generations coming in and going.
The layout like a formula, all the smells are here,
tobacco, musty bungalow, warmth of fire, the comfort of soft wood.
The composition of the central piece.
I don't know why it touches me but it does.
The choking throat never goes away
the blurring eyes I want to pray
to reunite my family with her one day.

Summer. Smoking. Smells.

this place is beyond

not quite all there

we haven't really seen any people yet

just a few who could be hired

it's a little like The Truman Show.

But beautiful.
Very beautiful.